If I had a name like Adrian Harewood
  Rob Thomas

with apologies to Wendy Morton

If I had a name like Adrian Harewood
I would wear those glasses all the kids are wearing
I would summon the weatherman and command the traffic
to thicken like cream

If I had a name like Adrian Harewood
I would be welcome in every living room, like yours
and evildoers would hang
on my every word

If I had a name like Adrian Harewood
the world would listen closely
or else

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